KEEP CALM AND KOREA ON

When the postman arrived at lunch time onFriday, the usual last minute pre-trip worries were vanquished. He'd expertly delivered, with just a dozen hours to spare, my passport from the embassy in London, complete with visa. And so, the day that I felt would never come, the day of departure, was finally here. With goodbyes said to friends, and hugs given to mum, I hit the road to the R.O.K. To prove it, I'm sitting at a restaurant in Thiefrow, sorry Heathrow Airport, getting ripped off for my last plate of Englishness: 4 huge, fat, greasy sausages somothered in beans, sloshed down with a steady stream of tea. As the kindly / sneaky waiter reminded me that a 'service charge' wasn't included on the gastronomic bill, and smilingly asked me where I was flying today sir, I kindly / sneakily replied, 'I'm going to a country where they don't ask for tips...sir.' He cleared my plates and skulked off, tea towel swinging between his legs. 

Leaving for Korea this time, it's more with a sense of relief than the usual excitement. I am looking forward to it, completely, as I have really missed being there, and I get to see my girlfriend for the first time in ages. But it's more to do with getting back into working and the routine of it all. Time and disappointment have made me lazy, and despite my best efforts, I haven't worked or earned money since December, apart from selling a couple of paintings, and let's be honest, I'm no Picasso. So not only are my funds low, but they're positively negative, if you know what I mean. A big thanks now to those that have bailed me out...you know who you are! THANKS.

The debts are of course largely down to the massive hoax that I was a victim of. In a nutshell, I signed a contract for a job that didn't exist, and have subsequently lost the last of my savings by buying pointless flight tickets and a trip to the U.S that in hindsight I couldn't afford. The scam was meticulous, and quite a few people got suckered the same way. It's a pity I don't believe in hell, as if I did, I'd hope the f******s who hoaxed me rot in it. That said, although it still makes me angry occasionally, I am totally over it...and to quote a trending phrase...

KEEP 

CALM

AND 

KOREA

ON

Coming very soon... "I could fit my bathroom inside my fridge," and other random stuff.